Lizard Point Quizzes

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Overheard in the classroom...

Oct 282015

A collection of funny classroom stories from various web sources.


First grader #1: Miss D.*, how old are you?
23-year-old Miss D.: Well…
First grader #2: Shhh! Don’t you know you’re not supposed to ask an old lady how old she is?

— Hauppauge, New York Overheard by: Toni


(We are studying the US state capitals in class, and the teacher is quizzing us on them.)

Teacher: “What is the capital of Connecticut?”
Class: *silence*
Teacher: “Umm… here’s a hint: It’s a shape and a car.”
Student: “Square Lamborghini!”

(It’s really Hartford. We still laugh about that to this day.)

— ELEMENTARY SCHOOL | CA, USA  http://notalwayslearning.com/ 


Students were creating a human skeleton using a variety of pastas. They could break them and shape them pretty much any way they needed to in order to complete the skeleton. I noticed something odd on one students skeleton and stupidly decided to ask about it…

Me: "Hey Ashley…why do you have that piece of fettuccine stuck to the pelvis?“
Student: "Well he’s a boy so…it’s a penis.”
Me: "Oh! Uh…well just so you know there isn’t actually a bone…there.“
Student: "Oh my gosh really?! …Wait…then why do they call it a….”
Me: "NO! Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. No more talking.“

I backed away and never questioned another pasta skeleton the rest of the day…

— http://mindsofmiddleschool.tumblr.com/post/112090002799/regretful-pasta


Teacher: What’s daddy’s first name?
Student: Daddy.
Teacher: No, his real name…like what does mommy call him?
Student: Oh, lazy.

- http://mommyiwantthis.com/overheard-in-the-classroom-a-collection-of-funny-things-preschoolers-say-in-class


Student: My babysitter is picking me up today; mommy had to go to the vagina doctor.

— http://mommyiwantthis.com/overheard-in-the-classroom-a-collection-of-funny-things-preschoolers-say-in-class/


Four Yr. Old on a field trip: Is this whole place China?
Teacher: We are still in NY but this is China town
Four Yr. Old: I bet Chinese McDonalds is deeelicious!!

— http://mommyiwantthis.com/overheard-in-the-classroom-a-collection-of-funny-things-preschoolers-say-in-class/


Teacher: Class, what comes after the letter K?
Student: Elameno

— http://mommyiwantthis.com/overheard-in-the-classroom-a-collection-of-funny-things-preschoolers-say-in-class/


I recently asked a student where his homework was. He replied, “It’s still in my pencil.”

—Larry Timmons, Surprise, Arizona


My sixth-grade class would not leave me alone for a second. It was a constant stream of “Ms. Osborn?” 
“Ms. Osborn?” “Ms. Osborn?” Fed up, I said firmly, “Do you think we could go for just five minutes without anyone saying ‘Ms. Osborn’?!”
The classroom got quiet. Then, from the back, a soft voice said, 
“Um … Cyndi?”

—Cyndi Osborn, New York, New York


"Yeah, I want to go to college! I really want to go! I have lots of money to pay for college!"
[Later on in conversation]
"Wait, college is school? I don't want to go to college! I didn't know college is SCHOOL!!"


On the last day of the year, my 
first graders gave me beautiful handwritten letters. As I read them aloud, 
my emotions got the better of me, and I started to choke up.
“I’m sorry,” I said. “I’m having a hard time reading.”
One of my students said, “Just sound it out.”

—Cindy Bugg, Clive, Iowa